MYTHR;

[propheta]

mythr

Reid Mattix ▐ 17

For all readings, please speak with my secretary, Mr. Lockley. We are now accepting car keys, first borns and virgin sacrifices as payment. Readings not guaranteed to have a lower bullshit than not content. I reserve the right to substitute myself with a Magic 8-Ball on days I just don't wanna.

For all other queries, bring me colored sand, feathers and string, or just yourself, and we'll talk. A smiley gets you 5 good karma, heart eyes gets you 10.

😍 FLIRT <span style="font-size:40px;">😍</span>

😃 FRIEND <span style="font-size:40px;">😃</span>

😕 NOPE <span style="font-size:40px;">😕</span>

Comments

[forsakened]

😕

[ Guess who just saw this page. ]

we're not accepting car keys
neither of us can drive

[ Reid no. ]

[propheta]

:(

[ dalton, how dare you betray him in this way??? ]

-5 karma. buddah frowns on ur frown.

[ that is... not really the right religion but whatever. also, not commenting on the car bit. ]

[forsakened]

if i give you heart eyes will you stop trying to kill me with cars

[ No driving. Ever. Not even driver's ed. ]

[propheta]

i'll consider it, which is more than what's happening right now.

besides, i wouldn't make you get in the car if you're scared. don't be scared, dalton. should i come hold your hand?

[forsakened]

i never know when you're kidding or not

[ Sometimes not even when he's right next to him. Reid has so much going on in his head that it's hard to get a reading on him.

That's definitely a good thing. ]

😍

now are you happy?

[propheta]

i can be a little of both

[ well, he thinks he can, at least, and that's what counts. ]

😍!!!

yes. +10 karma, but with your -5 from before, it only puts you at 5. she-wolf is beating you.

[forsakened]

this is a competition now?

i think i should be on +30 karma
for saving you from traffic
you'd hate traffic.

[propheta]

i already hate traffic, its always in places it isnt welcome

[ aka times that reid has wanted to walk somewhere and there was any kind of street in his way. u n w e l c o m e . ]

[forsakened]

[ See this is why he is never letting you drive, ever, in your life. ]

you mean like
roads
parking lots
those kinds of places???

[propheta]

[ that is rude, sir. ]

theyre annoying in places where people want to be walking
what happened to horses? at least they know to stop and don't make such annoying noises.

[ the amount of times reid has been honked at for almost stepping into the middle of streets is uncountable. ]

[forsakened]

[ Dalton briefly entertains a vision of Reid on horseback, stopping traffic while he gallops into the distance.

No. ]

you know the funny thing about horses
they're scared of traffic

they'd be a great role model actually

[propheta]

for cars or for people?

[ dalton you can't just surrender ground because a one ton hunk of metal on wheels going 60 says you'll die if you don't. somehow this makes sense in his head. ]

[forsakened]

for you!
be like the horses reid
avoid oncoming traffic

[ You're going to turn his hair grey. ]

[propheta]

there are horses that walk with traffic
do u want me to start pulling carriages too??
blinders would be stupid on me and i dont want to poop in a bag
no

[ what he means those horse drawn carriages that are in big cities, for tourists to pay for a little ride. ]

[forsakened]

those horses do tours around central park
they are not the horses we are looking for.
so unless you can predict exactly when cars will and will not hit you, we're not doing that.

[propheta]

is that a challenge

[forsakened]

please no

[propheta]

are u sure? it sounded like one